An Account of India Vs Pakistan ODI at Eden Gardens.

An India-Pakistan match is a war, no less. In Kashmir, the zealotry flows towards Pakistan, in all things cricket. People (including policemen) gather outside shops and around anyone with a radio to listen for good news that Pakistan is winning. People feign indifference if they are not. Mobile phones do make it easier, say Amen for little pleasures. The discourse is of and for Pakistan. The other team doesn’t really matter.

I am not a cricket fan. Not a big one at least. But this last ODI between India and Pakistan (played on 3 Jan, 2013) I was in a peculiar position. I wasn’t watching the game, but there were two blokes sitting near to me.  They were close friends and sat with their individual computers and net connections. They were live streaming the match from two different sources. Both had the same name, Imran, and both were supporting Pakistan (of course). Imran M and Imran K. A Shia and a Sunni.

The setting is a public place but there weren’t many people around.

Imran K: Out, I think?
Imran M: Really? Who? Shoaib Malik?
K: I think so.
M: Watch carefully, dumbhead. I’ll break your limbs if its true.
K: It’s buffering.
M: Here come Drok-mal? (Syed Ajmal)
K: (laughing) Drokmal! Kyaha goi.
M: Naar ha kodukh Pakistanas. I will kill these *******!
M: Four.
K: Yes.
M: Go ha byakh.
K: Naah! Waar wuechh.
M: Choakh gova? 
K: Yes. 

There is some commotion which among all the flow of passions is very hard to make sense of.

K: Ajmal ha gov?
M: Gov ha? Gaessin!

(There is a sudden drop in interest in the match. I guess they have gone to surf different things on the interwebs.) When suddenly…

M: Bowled! Lanath wessin yemin.. Ye gov Laanath wessin.
K: Umar Gul. (Somberly)  Irfan? He is a new player. First time batting.
M: Must be a righthanded player. Should be. They will lose the match easily. Easily. Retards!
(a momentary silence)
M:  Bowled!
K: Naah?
M: Wallah!

Pakistan was bundled for 250 and India was yet to bat. Imran M was sad that the score was less than 300, and Pakistan would lose easily. He wouldn’t have dinner if Pakistan lost.  Imran K was hopeful that Pakistan could still win.

PS: Pakistan won.


Author: Rich Autumns

Blogger from Kashmir. Twitter: @RichAutumns

2 thoughts on “An Account of India Vs Pakistan ODI at Eden Gardens.”

  1. When Pakistan got bowled out (with 10 balls to spare) at 250, we didn't have much hope also. I wasn't watching the match ball by ball but once India were six down, my interest in the match waned.
    This type of conversation (from what I could make out since some dialogues are in your native tongue) were taking place in many shops, offices, schools, colleges and homes in Pakistan also.
    I'm really glad the Man of the Match was Nasir Jamshed this time!


  2. You know, people in Kashmir vehemently support Pakistan's cricket team. Its ever been so. The firecrackers in Kashmir after the victory were like never before.

    Some of it is in Kashmiri (or Kaeshur) because, you know, some things cant be translated.


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